4. Solidarity Means Fighting For Everyone Who Fights With You. Even If You Think They’re An Asshole.

By Portia Turner

Being a human is hard.  Like mind-bogglingly hard.  And living in a society that doesn’t share your views on the world just makes everything harder.  It’s like, life before Trump was elected was hard, but it felt more like I was stuck between limestone and a hard place.  Now though, I feel like I am being suffocated between quartzite and a hard place and that’s terrifying. (Wow that metaphor took a lot of research.)

In times like this, it is very easy to decide that everything and everyone sucks.  Because, to be honest, a lot of people do suck.  Now, though, it is more important than ever to connect with people and find common ground.  We need to unite in numbers.  There are other people out there who think and feel the same way you do about issues.  The one problem is that many of these people are assholes.  Just because someone is an asshole, though, doesn’t mean that they don’t have a right to fight with you toward a common goal.  More than ever, we need to unite with the assholes.  An asshole woman deserves the rights to her own body as much as I do, and we need to fight for one another right now, not against each other.

Here are some things to remember:

  • Everyone has a different way of dealing with the stress that scary, terrible times bring on.  Some people take to Facebook and post incredibly political and sometimes obnoxious posts about how people have to behave.  They deal with the fact that we are all specks in a giant universe by freaking out and feeling the need to force people to react certain ways in order to make it feel like they are making more of an impact on the situation.  This can be incredibly stressful.  The opposite can also be true.  Some people get overwhelmed and don’t post about things.  This doesn’t make them any less worried or involved with the situation.  Depending on which end of this spectrum you are on, you might find yourself becoming more and more frustrated by the other end.  What we all need to keep in mind is that a lot of us are all fighting for the same causes.  Just because someone goes about dealing with their stress in different ways doesn't mean that you shouldn’t support them.
  • The world is in a place right now where we are all looking for a fight and anything could cause fights, causing a splintering of people into smaller subgroups when what we really need are large groups of people uniting over a common cause.  Here’s an idea: instead of confronting an asshole over something that doesn’t relate to the fight, write down those thoughts.  When you are further away from the situation, go back to those notes and write something.  Maybe an essay or a book or a comedy piece.  This way there is a silver lining to the whole situation, and you get to unite right now over what is important.
  • Find common ground and avoid topics with the assholes that you know will start arguments.  This way you can trick yourself into believing that they aren’t really that bad.
  • Remember that, if you unite with these assholes now, you can defeat the bigger assholes.  And then, once the larger assholes are dealt with, you can go back and take on the smaller assholes.  It’s a win-win situation.

It’s time for us all to come together and fight for each other.  Only when we are all united can we win the war.

(Also, keep in mind that some people probably think you are an asshole, and wouldn’t you rather have these people fighting with you than against you?)